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12 Dec 2009

Just For A Laugh

Today's joke, posted on Twitter. Providing the link here so one can go back & read more...

Nine Words Women Use

Posted by: Jester

Here, we will examine nine words and phrases that women use that are commonly misunderstood.

  1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
  2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
  3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with “nothing” usually end in “fine”.
  4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Whatever it is, Don’t Do It!
  5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word – a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of “nothing”.)
  6. That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
  7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you… do not question, or faint. Just say “you’re welcome”. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says “Thanks a lot” – that is pure sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. Be careful that “you’re welcome” doesn’t bring on a “whatever”).
  8. Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying F– YOU!
  9. Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong?” For the woman’s response refer to #3.

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